Omnimaga
General Discussion => Other Discussions => Humour and Jokes => Topic started by: SirCmpwn on June 22, 2010, 01:46:06 pm
-
It would only store in RAM and require users to manually move things to their HDD
-
Caps lock would be always on.
-
3rd party code would not be allowed.
-
lol XD
4- the OS would take 10x more space than 7, XP and vista combined together (I mean, OS 2.0.1 takes more than half of my Nspire memory x.x)
5- if you installed older versions of their OS on new comp hardware, the screen of the monitor would no longer display any content if turned off then back on, until next computer reboot
-
6 - It would come pre-installed with financial software that you couldn't uninstall.
-
7 - It would not really shut down, just turn off the monitor and pretend to be off
-
8 - It would frequently crash, making it lose all your files, because of a weird manipulation.
-
9 - Later versions would not be able to use the last half of your RAM
-
10 - You'd have to use TI custom devices, including a crappy LCD.
-
11 - When we attempt at unlocking the OS to third party dev, TI would release a patch fixing that hole every update
12 - It would be slow as hell, even more than Vi$ta
13 - Older versions of their OS would be made so they won't install/work well as much as possible on newer computer hardware. It would check the amount of RAM, the video card kind and other stuff, and if it's not listed, then installing would abort.
14 - Using certain external USB devices like harddrives or DVD players could potentially fry your computer. (This happened to Mic's TI-Nspire on TI-BANK when he tried OS 2.0, I believe)
-
15- It would be epic fail
16- The OS must have bugs
17- It would have stupid C code and even weirder hand written x86 assembly
18- would not support multitasking on old CPUs without threads or multiple cores, more than 8-bit sound or colour graphics
-
19) you can only develop software in TI BASIC. with Line() being your most intensive graphics command
20) the one thing you're confident about the OS is that it can at least do math.
21) other than that though... you're out of luck
-
22) All your programs would be split into Applications and Programs, even though they would be run the same way. And applications would all be sized in multiples of 4,294,967,295 bytes.
-
23) TI would have used about 80% code from another OS to make their own.
-
24) It would be possible to put the LCD into Test Mode and turn it blue. :P
-
15- It would be epic fail
16- The OS must have bugs
17- It would have stupid C code and even weirder hand written x86 assembly
18- would not support multitasking on old CPUs without threads or multiple cores, more than 8-bit sound or colour graphics
25) It wouldn't even natively support color. You'd have to write programs to make it display colors.
-
26) It would be a major pain to send files from a computer to another, especially on the 64-bit version of the OS. Most USB transfer attempts would take 10 secs to startup at all and often fail.
27) If the OS supports sound, on some sound cards, when attempting #26, in some rare occasions, sound would totally stop working on your computer. You would need to reboot to fix it. (Note, TI-Connect sometimes did that to me on Windows XP)
-
28) The OS would only be used to emulate another (older) OS, with crappy USB drivers and loss of support for some of the previous commands.
-
29.) The screen would become distorted when running older programs.
-
30.) Newer versions could only access the first 3/8 of RAM.
-
31) you would have to poll each key to see if it was pressed
32) random commands that do nothing useful must be added.
-
33) Only the arrow keys and the Delete key would repeat if held.
34) Natively, it would only support mouse movement via the arrow keys, and in order to use a real mouse, you'd have to do a hardware mod.
-
35) The power button looks like just another key on the keyboard
36) The power button can force quit programs written in the OS shell script
37) With any other program, there is no way to quit it if it errs
38) There is no multitasking, nor libraries, nor memory protection.
-
39)
(EDIT (DJ): host did not support remote linking so I put the image attached to the post)
-
40) The monitor is an analog TV (following 39)
-
41) It would only support one font set, and you would have to write a program to *temporarily* replace it.
-
42:It would only have one USB port.
43:You would have to buy an adapter to play music and plug in flashdrives
44:A special key combination can disable applications and programs
-
45: Its only built in language has massive slowdowns, memory leaks, and glitches
-
46) It would display binary as tokens instead of using base 2 numbering.
-
47: some of the keys would be tacky-ly different from the rest and bound to opening certain features
48: it can only be powered by AAA batteries
49: you can't transfer files if the batteries are low
50: it takes up the entire screen to display a simple message like "Your batteries are low. Recommend change of batteries."
-
added poll for the first 50
-
Oh boy, choices, choices.
51) The headphone jack is used for communicating between computers.
52) Only two computer may communicate at a time
53) The computer has other ports, but they are undocumented, used by the OS only.
54) The headphone jack only supports two states, powered and unpowered. It's not even supposed to be used to play sound, but to link! (51)
-
55) The key that causes the most loss of data is located directly adjacent to the arrow keys keys. (see 34)
56) A maximum of 10 saved image files would be supported, without 3rd party software modification.
57) The only internet connection possible would be via telnet.
58) The Login Dialog can be permanently disabled by temporarily removing the power source.
59) Cleaning the keyboard requires removal of the computer's power supply and motherboard.
-
Ah, why didn't I see this earlier?
60: It takes 6 keystrokes to wipe out the hard disk.
61: Assembly programming requires a more powerful computer (read: made by a different company) or hand-coded hex.
62: It would run always run at one processing speed (except for certain models that allow speeding up by 2.5x).
63: Identification is in the form of a strip of masking tape on the back.
64: Filenames can be up to eight letters, numbers, or thetas starting with either a letter or theta.
65: Although file extensions are not supported, memory types are predefined, and the only real form of memory (AppVars) are inaccessible except by assembly programs.
EDIT: Oh yeah, and:
66: It would outsell all competition combined by 10-1, regardless.
-
Since everyone's listed a lot of ones for the 83+/84+ already, some of these are for other calculators.
67. The first two versions wouldn't have any way of linking to other computers or devices.
68. One of the latest versions makes practically every program written for an older version incompatible.
69. Deleting an application would damage your flash memory.
70. Newer versions would have more memory, but would be cluttered with some useless applications (see 69).
71. The headphone jack, used for communication between computers, is only weakly soldered and can easily break.
72. The latest version didn't support any programming when TI first released it.
73. In order to communicate with it from another computer, you need special linking software that doesn't work half of the time.
-
74) Diagnostic mode would clear all memory and storage.
75) Background programs would have to be specifically not to conflict with each other.
76) Boot times would be instantaneous on all but the newest software versions.
77) All USB ports would be slightly too small, and require adapters.
78) Commands cannot be typed, only pasted from a gigantic menu.
79) The lowercase letters u, v, and w will have identical counterparts with different character codes.
80) If an exception is thrown, your computer will automatically format it's primary hard drive.
-
81) IT MAKES VIS
TA LOOK GOOD IN
COMPARISON
82) IT STARTS A
NEW LINE EVERY 1
6 CHARACTERS
(THIS POST WAS M
ADE ON OS 1.0)
-
lol @80.
82) It's system restore points would often save incorrectly, reporting Err:Version on restore.
83) It wouldn't work in the dark.
84) Holding certain buttons on startup would completely disable the computer, requiring a direct usb link with another Ti PC.
85) It's user's have written more info on it than Ti has.
-
86: There would be no directories to speak of.
87: The only form of packing data is in the form of groups, which would be buggy and provide no compression whatsoever.
88: There wouldn't be much of a technical support group except for private communities.
-
89) BrandonW gives up in trying to fix all the bugs.
90) The only superiority it has over other computers are it's limitless third-party applications and programs.
91) >9000 of them are Quadratic Solvers.
-
92) When plugging in speakers or headphones, the keyboard and mouse would no longer respond except during CPU-intensive applications.
-
93) TI would eventually discontinue older models that are actually better than the new models that replaced them.
94) The newest OS's would be buggy and you wouldn't be able to downgrade some of them.
-
Not sure if this has already been listed, but
95. The shell script language would be token-based, non-expandable, and require a slow, built-in editor.
96. Scrolling to a line near the end of a script would require scrolling through everything else.
97. You can't copy one shell script to another without watching it scroll through every line of code. With ASM programs, you have to have a special 3rd-party utility.
-
98: There would be no copy-and-paste of any kind except for tricks using the abovementioned method.
99: You wouldn't be able to use it in the dark because there is no backlight.
100:
-
You forgot 100 :P
100: You'd need a special keyboard made by TI to easily type lowercase letters and common symbols such as $,%,&, and #
101: Each of those characters would be two bytes, b/c the OS is token-based and those characters aren't important enough
-
94 ;D
102: Word processing would suck b/c only eight lines are visible at a time (and only sixteen characters per line, but that's already been mentioned.)
103: newer OS versions would need patches made by BrandonW in order to work properly.
-
104:
(http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/windows_7.png)
-
LOL. :P
also: Holy necropost!
-
105: You would only have 10 .txt files to use, which are named Str1-Str9 and Str0.
106: Both shell scripts and actual programs would have a .exe extension, even though you run them differently. Running one type as another would result in an error message covering the top 37.5% of your screen.
107: Pressing a certain key combination while turning on would disable all programs and applications from running. Oh, and it would delete all your .zip files, too.
-
108: Zip files cannot be viewed - only extracted. Oh, and have fun with your corrupt files.
-
109: Only 10 pictures could be stored in the PC
-
110. It would be worst than Vista.
111. and Windows 95
-
112. The only color achievable would be blue, but having blue would damage the LCD.
-
113: The only thing it would be good at would be math, but it'd waste twice as much processing time as any functionally identical routine known to man.
-
114: To download new software from TI, you have to use a non-TI computer to connect to the Internet.
-
115: Text characters appear pixel by pixel, updating the display every pixel.
-
116: Directories? What?
-
117: Some ASCII characters being 2 bytes in size, a crash occurs with the following:
-If you have an even amount of RAM remaining and you try pasting a bunch of character requiring a higher, but non-even amount of RAM, and the last char before running out of RAM is a 2 byte one.
-If you have a non-even amount of RAM remaining and you try pasting a bunch of character requiring a higher, but even amount of RAM, and the last char before running out of RAM is a 2 byte one.
-
118: To use any of the commands, you have to open an intricate series of menus or scroll through a large catalog of commands.
-
116: Directories? What?
O.o Why would we ever use those?
-
119: Only hooks would let you change the OS entirely
-
120: Hooks are destroyed when the computer is turned on or off, and when you open or close any file or program.
-
121. It uses an ABCDE keyboard instead of a QWERTY one.
122. Computers running this OS are permitted on the SAT because it is so locked-down.
-
123. There would be no wifi
124. The only way to get sound (which is not naturally usable) is to have headphones with a 2.5mm jack
-
125: One model would use thirty year old hardware, but would somehow cost more than another more powerful model using ten year old hardware.
EDIT: Numbering fixed.
-
Uhhhh....wrong numbering? :P
-
126:
Uhhhh....wrong numbering? :P
^ on the PC.
-
127: After long deliberation, they decide to include directories, but they are only one level deep.
-
128. then they remove it after the serial number "G" to save a couple of cents.
-
129. K models would behave completely differently from all other models, as the engineers who designed the production process were doubtlessly high on something.
-
15- It would be epic fail
16- The OS must have bugs
17- It would have stupid C code and even weirder hand written x86 assembly
18- would not support multitasking on old CPUs without threads or multiple cores, more than 8-bit sound or colour graphics
25) It wouldn't even natively support color. You'd have to write programs to make it display colors.
130: The only way to get colors would be if you fried the LCD.
-
131: You can't perform any defragmentation (=TI garbage collect) if your batteries are low
-
15- It would be epic fail
16- The OS must have bugs
17- It would have stupid C code and even weirder hand written x86 assembly
18- would not support multitasking on old CPUs without threads or multiple cores, more than 8-bit sound or colour graphics
25) It wouldn't even natively support color. You'd have to write programs to make it display colors.
130: The only way to get colors would be if you fried the LCD.
132. or pressed the screen really hard
-
15- It would be epic fail
16- The OS must have bugs
17- It would have stupid C code and even weirder hand written x86 assembly
18- would not support multitasking on old CPUs without threads or multiple cores, more than 8-bit sound or colour graphics
25) It wouldn't even natively support color. You'd have to write programs to make it display colors.
130: The only way to get colors would be if you fried the LCD.
132. or pressed the screen really hard
even if you dont press really hard, you get rainbow colors :)
BTW, nice dcs signature I have, eh?
(everyone's gonna steal it without adding me to the credits)
-
Really nice signature. I may still it, and link it to your profile, hein?
-
15- It would be epic fail
16- The OS must have bugs
17- It would have stupid C code and even weirder hand written x86 assembly
18- would not support multitasking on old CPUs without threads or multiple cores, more than 8-bit sound or colour graphics
25) It wouldn't even natively support color. You'd have to write programs to make it display colors.
130: The only way to get colors would be if you fried the LCD.
132. or pressed the screen really hard
even if you dont press really hard, you get rainbow colors :)
BTW, nice dcs signature I have, eh?
(everyone's gonna steal it without adding me to the credits)
hmm... is this better? :P
-
I thought Kerm made it? ???
-
Kerm's:
(http://www.cemetech.net/img/sigs/dcs7userbar2.png)
Modified:
(http://img259.imageshack.us/img259/561/oietwinklesj.gif)
I think the shiny star things (intelligent explanation, I know :P) were added in by somebody else.
-
Oh I see now. I wasn't sure if they were part of the original. They are awesome ;D
-
lol. btw, I know 1 more:
133. If you want to e-mail, you have to link you computer to another to mail it to the other PC. mails that are sent over more than 200 centimeter give an 'Error in XMit' message
-
134: To close a window, press the power button.
-
135. To close the window, press the power button.
-
136: Upgrades to the OS are free, but each one is progressively bigger and more unstable :P
-
136: Upgrades to the OS are free, but each one is progressively bigger and more unstable :P
137: On the bright side, they have the added functionality of blocking downgrades.
-
138: Attempting to install Linux on the fancier versions involves factoring a 1024 bit public key.
-
139. 52) Only two computers may communicate at a time, except by using a hub made by a third party... and software written by a third party...
(139. is an addition to calcdude's entry #52)
-
140. You can not upgrade your graphics card, since the LCD will turn flicker-ish because the LCD driver can't cope with the speed.
-
141. Any non-proprietary ports are rewired to strange card edge connections on the bottom of the (Mandatory Custom) monitor, and it crashes if you have a hard drive >32 MB :P
-
142: The default desktop background would consist of two lines, one horizontal and one vertical, intersecting at the center of the screen.
143: Pressing the wrong combination of keys at startup would hide all executables and delete any file that happens to be in a folder.
144: #143 would be a feature.
145: The only letter you'd be able to type with one keypress would be an uppercase X. Through a preference setting, this can be changed to T, theta, or an italic lowercase n.
146: The only way to shut it down would be to pull out all batteries and other power sources.
-
147: There'd be tons of security around several parts of the computer that would, over time, the users would discover that extremely simple solutions exist to remove them.
-
147. The operating procedure would be to turn it off every 10 min to keep it from overheating.
148. If you put a casio fx-7400 in the room, it would overheat from the embarrassment and never turn on again for fear that you might like the fx-7400 more than it. XD
-
149: Let's be honest. It would be great at its (officially intended) purpose.
-
Total Voters : 42
Stop voting.
:w00t:
-
should I lock the poll? :P
-
Already done :
(Voting closed: Yesterday at 18:42:19)
this is epic.
-
Was this the original poll or a new one by the way? ???
-
Original, I think.
-
Here's the login screen:
(http://clrhome.tk/resources/homer/?t=++++++Texas%0D%0A+++Instruments%0D%0A++++++Login%0D%0AUsername%3D%0D%0A++%22Spyro543%22%0D%0APassword%3D%0D%0A++%22Whatever%22%0D%0A+++++%3ELogin%3C)
And here's your "desktop":
(http://clrhome.tk/resources/homer/?t=Spyro543@TIPC%0D%0A+Apps%0D%0A+Prgms%0D%0A+New+Prgm%0D%0A+Home+Screen%0D%0A%3EComp+Link%0D%0A+End+Session%0D%0A+Session+Info)
-
Original, I think.
Then how did it only get 42 votes? O.O
-
Well, for me, I didn't vote because there was too many possibilities (spelling fail ?) and we could only choose one. Maybe other people thought like me, I don't know.
-
Kind of off-topic, but this has to be the biggest poll in both content and options that I've seen on this whole forum :crazy:
Original, I think.
Then how did it only get 42 votes? O.O
It was closed at 42 votes..maybe it went inactive for a long time?