Omnimaga
General Discussion => Other Discussions => Humour and Jokes => Topic started by: TheBassetHound on May 23, 2013, 09:38:20 pm
-
When I'm outside wearing a jacket, I always put my hands in my pockets. I walked out of school today, and tried to put my hands in my pockets. Then I thought, 'Wait...
:If temp<45 and coat=1
:prgmHANDSINPOCKET
:Else
:prgmHANDSDOWN
Coat=0 and temp is over 50... So no hands.'
A: I need a life, and
B: Have you ever had times like this? Can you come up with a makeshift program for your habits? Please let me know I'm not the only one who does this...
-
Temp and coat would have to be T and C, respectively, unless you're running 68k Basic, in which case the program calls would be hipocket() and hdsdown(), respectively. Even with the 83+ variant, you'll need to shorten the programs to prgmHIPOCKET and prgmHDSDOWN.
-
When I'm outside wearing a jacket, I always put my hands in my pockets. I walked out of school today, and tried to put my hands in my pockets. Then I thought, 'Wait...
:If temp<45 and coat=1
:prgmHANDSINPOCKET
:Else
:prgmHANDSDOWN
Coat=0 and temp is over 50... So no hands.'
A: I need a life, and
B: Have you ever had times like this? Can you come up with a makeshift program for your habits? Please let me know I'm not the only one who does this...
You forgot to End your If.
/me runs
:P
-
def main():
while(onComp):
while(steamOpened):
useSteam()
def useSteam():
checkStore()
game = chooseGame()
play(game)
def checkStore():
for game in catalogue:
if game.onSale and game.getCost() <= $10:
buy(game)
main()
-
When I get home...
door.unlock();
door.open();
if(!hairdressingsalon.open) door.lock();
schoolbag.get(laptop, plug);
plug.on(wall, laptop);
laptop.start();
laptop.exec("/usr/bin/google-chrome http://www.omnimaga.org/");
-
def getHome():
if !omnimaga:
laptop.exec("firefox http://www.omnimaga.org")
if feelingClever:
laptop.exec("notepad++")
else:
laptop.exec("KSP")
getHome()
-
.COMPY
#Axiom(RUNPRGM)
If FEELCLEVER
CODE()
ElseIf FEELADV
TWEAKLINUX()
Else
OMNI()
End
Return
Lbl CODE
RunPrgm(gedit TheGAME.z80)
While 1
!If rand^5
OMNI()
End
End
Return
Lbl TWEAKLINUX
RunPrgm(linux)
MessStuffUp
Return
Lbl OMNI
RunPrgm(chrome http://www.omnimaga.org)
While 1
End
:P
-
gethome.c
int main(void) {
if (doorIsLocked()) {
if (haveKey())
unlockDoor();
else {
if (havePhone())
callParents();
else exit(1);
}
}
}
openDoor();
if (!parentsPresent()) {
SESSION* s = turnOnComputer();
if (!isOpen(s, "chrome"))
openPrgm(s, "chrome");
check(s, "chrome", "http://www.omnimaga.org);
}
else {
greetParents();
}
}
}
-
while(true)
sleep();
-
:"Bed"->Str1
:"Insomnia"->Str2
:"Me"->Str3
:DelVar Str2
:Str1+Str3
Just something I wish I could do :P
-
while(teenager) {
if(athome){
if(withcompany){
beLazy();
getOnComputer();
} else {
beLazy();
getOnComputer();
}
} else if(atschool) {
school();
} else if(atstore && withmom) {
askForCandy();
} else {
doNothing();
}
}
-
while(true)
sleep();
My sentiments exactly.
Oh and another one:
:If inRoom=1and iPod=1
:iPod->dock
:End
:Else
:prgmWALKBACK
:End
:If Dock=1 and Sister=0
:putOn Pandora
:End
:If Sister=1
:prgmGTFO
:End
:Else
:End
:If Pandora=BrunoMars-Treasure
:prgmSING
And these aren't meant to be perfect, just FYI.
-
lol, i was about to optimize and fix...
-
I am pretty bad at programming, but I'm taking a class this summer to fix that. I like people on Omni (and Ponies too [There, sorunome {and Streetwalker}]), you're all nice.
:If BOBSAYZHAI
:GetVocal- : "Hello"
:If BOBSAYZPIE
:GetVocal-?: "What flavor"
:If BOBSAYZPIEFLAVOR
:Happy->Mood
Yay I like random :D ("I baked you a pie." "Oh boy! What flavor?" "Pie flavor.")
So... yeah
-
(and Ponies too [There, sorunome])
You forgot me. D:
-
While (nojob):
sleep(20)
-
if (bored && hasSpareTime) {
makeYetAnotherAlienBreed();
}
else {
daydreamAboutAnotherAlienBreed();
}
-
If freetime== true then
WorkAllDay ()
end
It's making me crazy.
-
/*
* life.c
*
* Copyright 2013 shmibs <[email protected]>
*
* This program is free software; you can redistribute it and/or modify
* it under the terms of the GNU General Public License as published by
* the Free Software Foundation; either version 3 of the License, or
* (at your option) any later version.
*
* This program is distributed in the hope that it will be useful,
* but WITHOUT ANY WARRANTY; without even the implied warranty of
* MERCHANTABILITY or FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. See the
* GNU General Public License for more details.
*
* You should have received a copy of the GNU General Public License
* along with this program; if not, write to the Free Software
* Foundation, Inc., 51 Franklin Street, Fifth Floor, Boston,
* MA 02110-1301, USA.
*
*
*/
#include <stdio.h>
typedef struct show {
video episodes[26];
video extras[4];
} show;
typedef enum p_type {
AXE,
C,
PERL,
BASH,
ASM,
DESKTOP_CONFIGS,
FIXING_ARCH_AFTER_HAVING_BROKEN_IT_YET_AGAIN
} p_type;
typedef struct project {
p_type type;
int difficulty;
} p_type;
typedef struct chan {
member member_list[40]; /* i never talk in channels with more than 40 people. they're too hectic */
topic current_topic;
} chan;
typedef struct amusement_node {
show current_anime;
video current_film;
book current_book;
album current_album;
chan current_channel;
project current_project;
amusement_node* next;
} amusement_node;
int main(int argc, char **argv) {
int depressed, busy=FALSE, day=0, age=0;
amusement_node* head=NULL, temp;
while(TRUE) {
while(schoolwork_check()) {
do_schoolwork();
depressed=TRUE;
busy=TRUE;
}
if(head != NULL) {
process_amusement(head);
if(!(rand()%3)) {
depressed=FALSE;
} else {
depressed=TRUE;
}
temp=head->next;
free(head);
head=temp;
busy=TRUE;
}
if(!busy)
depressed=TRUE;
day++;
if(!(day%365)) {
age++;
}
if(!(rand%( (100-age)*2000)))
break;
}
return 0;
}
-
public static void getUp(){
UnderwearDrawer.takeRandom().wear();
body.arm.pushAway(blanket);
body.performMotion(Motion.stand_up);
body.legs.walkTo(closet.getLocation());
body.arm.interact(closet.door,Action.open);
tshirtStack.takeTopOne().wear();
sweaterStack.takeTopOne().wear();
pants.takeRandom();
body.arm.interact(closet.door,Action.close);
body.legs.walkTo(room.door.getLocation());
body.arm.interact(room.door,Action.open);
body.legs.walkTo(stairs.getLocation());
body.performMotion(Motion.walkDownStairs);
}